How to Find Your Soulmate

Saturday, February 14, 2009

Many people feel that there's one person out there who can enrich your life in a way that no one else can. If this is true, how can you increase your chances of finding this person? And when you meet him or her, how will you know it's your soulmate?

Be the person you would love to love. Instead of waiting for your soulmate to appear, make yourself the person you would like to find. Work on becoming the unique individual you're looking for. Just as you would want your soulmate to be comfortable in their own skin, work on just being yourself. You'll stand a better chance of getting noticed if you are comfortable, confident, and happy to be you. Expressing your individuality is the closest you can come to advertising your soulmate potential. Not only will you stand out, but you'll also be doing things that are more likely to bring you closer to your soulmate, who probably has similar interests and goals.

* How to Be Yourself
* How to Build Self Confidence
Remember that your soulmate might not be what you expect. If there's only one person in the world who can be your soulmate, what are the chances that they'll live in your town, look like the people you grew up with, or even speak the same language? Your soulmate does not have to live in the same country or even the same hemisphere as you. You don't have to be willing to span the globe for your true love, but you do need to be receptive to people with different backgrounds. Also, if you're expecting your soulmate to be love at first sight, you might never find what you're looking for. So keep an open mind. Part of the romance of having a soulmate is being pleasantly surprised.
Be patient. Life doesn't normally work on the schedule you envision. Your soulmate might cross your path when you're 8 or 80 years old. Don't be surprised either if there is a considerable age difference between the two of you. Yes, you might look forward to spending the majority of your life with your soulmate—perhaps buying a house, getting married, starting a family—but things do not always go as you plan. Your soulmate will color your world no matter how old you are, so don't rush into things, or else you might end up forcing the wrong person into the soulmate box, which will cause pain for everyone involved.

* How to Stop Being Needy
* How to Be Laid Back
Accept people for who they are, not who you want them to be. When you've got all these fantasies flying around in your head about how wonderful and special your soulmate will be, it can be easy to look for those specific characteristics and features in anyone you get involved with. Unfortunately, unrealistic expectations can ruin a relationship, and might even chase your soulmate away. Whoever it is that you think might be your soulmate, appreciate their individuality and trust that if this person is your soulmate, they'll never need to change who they are for you, just like you'll never need to change who you are for them. That doesn't mean that you can't encourage them to try something new or help them to grow as a person, just don't force things on them that they are not comfortable with.
Weather the storms. Contrary to what popular media would have you believe, meeting your soulmate doesn't guarantee "happily ever after." Things won't get easier when you find that special someone, and in fact, they might get even harder. Ultimately, a soulmate is someone with whom you can grow, and the only way to grow together is to face challenges together. So if you put your heart and soul into a relationship, stick with it through the ups and downs, even when you question whether it's meant to be, and you might look back decades later and realize that you were with your soulmate all along. True love with your soulmate does not grow on its own: it must be cultivated and continually nurtured. So be lovable, and be willing to love like there is no tomorrow.

* How to Have a Healthy Relationship

You need to find yourself before you find your soulmate. Once you're happy with yourself, a soulmate can make you even happier, but no one can fill a void created by not knowing who you are.
Don't obsess over finding your soulmate. Coming off as needy and desperate for love is not attractive to a soulmate—nor to anyone else, for that matter! Just be yourself, keep an open mind, and wait.

Before you consider the steps above, reflect on the idea that a "soulmate" might be an idealized fantasy. It is a very real possibility that many people can qualify as a soulmate, not just one other person in the entire world. Although no one likes to entertain the possibility, it is equally true that you may never find your soulmate.


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