Create An Extraordinary Quality Life

Thursday, May 29, 2008

Psychology is fundamental to your actions and behavior. Learn basic psychology and you will understand and change the outcome of your actions. The use of your state, focus and language patterns will enable you to enjoy life at the extraordinary quality.
Life is so interesting, it is very different between each and every person. Some times, people just wonder why they can not achieve what somebody else can do while their backgrounds and environments are not different at all. What are the compositions of life in which we can search for and make us live in full potential? Is there a chance that we can enhance the quality of our life to the same level as the great accomplishers do? What are the ways? I have laid out here the fundamentals of how to create an extraordinary quality of life. This will be useful for your application to your life for your growth in all relevant areas.
>Commit to a Healthy Lifestyle: To understand the quality of life, we need to understand one word, it is psychology. The single force that shapes your life is the force of psychology. By definition, psychology is the process by which you interpret the world to create meaning in your life. All the success gurus in this world teach that psychology is the only source of the causes that make you success or fail. Right psychology will not only make you a fortune but also all the happiness you want in life. The first ingredient that affects our mind is physiology, or how we use our body. We do things according to our physiology pattern. These include the way we put our posture, our movement, and even go further to the biochemistry in the body. Do you know that the tears you have when you cry out of sorrow and when you cry from joy have different chemical ingredients? Do you know that we can easily change the chemical composition in our blood just only feel differently? This is true. When we have different physiological pattern, we act differently. We can straighten up our body, put our shoulders up , put a smile in our face. Physiology can lead you to a certain state of the mind.
Think Positive: Your state of mind is the major cause of how you do things.
Your state controls you like a programmer is controlling a computer. People normally work perfectly well, they just run poor programs. If you need to change the results, you need to start first with your state. This is why we need to be excited all the time. We need to be passionate in what we are doing. This is what the top athletes do before they go into all important matches. They put themselves in the right state which is called peak state. This is a state which we believe that we fully control our life and we will succeed no matter what the circumstance is.
Visualize your Transformation: Making visualization will help you go into that state. Every morning if you visualize what you want to achieve regularly, we will be able to put yourself into peak state and will be ready for your daily challenge.

Confront and Remove Obstacles in your Life: After you put yourself into the state that you are ready to confront everything,
you start with the right focus. The focus on your goals will help you do what is relevant to it and eliminate unnecessary task. The focus is controlled by your values, beliefs, rules and identity. You need to raise your standard in all area. Choose these controlling factors that will empower you to the next level not to lower you down.
The other factor that controls our action is the language we use with ourselves.
What message or what meaning we give to a certain outcome you get. Believe it or not, people are always searching for meaning to look for what will mean “Pain” and what will mean “Pleasure” to them. The pattern of the language includes the vocabulary, positive affirmation and making metaphors. Using the right technique will enable you to cope with the situation correctly. When you get the outside information, you normally ask yourself what this means to me. Then the next question to yourself is what I should do using the information in your brain. You may try to delete the unnecessary information, distort the information you don’t want or generalize the information that is simple. This all comes from the interpretation process in your brain according to your self-communication. Make sure that you use the right language and ask the right question. If you ask the right question, you get the right answer. It is the same as lousy question.

Dying will destroy your extraordinary quality of life, trying not to die will further preserve your quality of life.

Understanding and Maintaining family Cohesion

We can choose our mates, our friends, sometimes even our co-workers, but we’re given no choice with the closest people in our lives, our family members. We are simply stuck with them for better or for worse and we are bound to them and they are bound to us, for ever.

As human beings, we are gifted with unique and differing personalities, characteristics, traits, flaws and values, too many aspects of differences to list. Interaction, therefore, is not always harmonious. Family members don’t always get along with one another and disagreements are simply part of an inevitable outcome. Kinship does not necessarily have to be a recurrent nightmare, nevertheless. There are ways to survive the family discord, an aggressive cacophony that so predictably ensues as immeasurable differences are thrown together randomly, to mix so fiercely like boiling water and oil.

Step back and reflect on the situations that cause conflict. You might actually begin to appreciate the differences in others around you, the variations that play upon the family dynamics as a whole. Take a closer look and you may even find hidden similarities you appreciate as well. If you're not careful, you could actually end up liking your family members even though they seem impossible to comprehend and drive you absolutely crazy. Coexistence with your family unit can actually become bearable, perhaps even enjoyable, despite the seething madness, the exasperation, the mayhem and inane antagonism. It just takes a good deal of consideration and understanding, kindness and courage and tact as well as patience, patience, patience and more patience.
Understand that it's simply impossible to get along with everybody all of the time. Because we are human, each one of us is absolutely unique unto ourselves and completely different from everyone else. We all have the right to exist as we are and we all have the right to our own feelings, habits, and personalities as we diversify naturally. Each member of a family has a special role to play for the purpose of the whole. Recognizing and respecting each person’s right to their unique place in the family dynamic is the first big step to a peaceful co-existence. This also means accepting that some family members will not understand this concept, nor will they respect other family members’ unique roles or their rights to exist in the home as individuals. Therefore, we also must accept that they have the right to not understand, or perhaps are lacking the capacity or merely the desire to understand and that they cannot or will not accept other individuals rights to deviate from their own understanding or lack thereof. Conflicts arise as humans diversify. Understanding and tolerance of others is only achieved from the acceptance of their right to exist as individuals. Respect for anybody is still a long way off, so we are just going to have to make due with being polite for right now

Be patient, even if others aren't. Unfortunately, not everyone will hold such a virtue as patience. Impatience is unavoidable, because as human beings, we are all often rash, cruel, rude, disgusting, etc., to varying degrees. We are sensitive, callous, considerate, tolerant, inconsiderate, petty, profound at different times and in different situations. The best thing we can do is to try to be aware of this, be prepared for it, and learn to avoid such moments when personalities will surely clash. We must learn how to adapt to and overcome the conflicts of our obvious differences in order to remain functional in a family group. Only with patience and understanding can we achieve successful cooperation

Work on being friendly. If you’re nice to everyone first thing in the morning, they’ll be nice to you all day long. Taking a moment to say or do something pleasant and kind is greatly rewarding both for you and for the recipient. Instead of just going through routine motions, try to greet your family members amiably with sincere warmth and affection. No matter how small or insignificant a gesture may seem, it still goes a long way to create a relaxed and cheerful atmosphere for all. Furthermore, you can combine a good-natured smile with a thoughtful compliment to instantly achieve a total sense of civil unity within the group. A family greatly at ease is far less predisposed to inner controversy and battles. To continue the comfortable alliance all around everyone will be wholly content to keep the peace.

Realize that sometimes, conflict will be unavoidable. Buttons will be pressed, tempers will flare, and arguments will undoubtedly happen. One good thing about family however, is that it is family. No matter what they do to you or you do to them, you're still all in it together. There’s no possible breaking up or permanent severance.

Know that squabbling is a natural, normal, even healthy aspect of interacting families. Bickering keeps each role in a unit clearly defined. Our occasional quarrels are reminders of a basic primordial human need for a role in a small family unit on which we still depend. Today, our conflicts arise from a lack of dependency on the cooperation of our family group for immediate gain. Without a dire need of one another, we must recognize our developmental strengths and remember how to use them constructively for the good of everyone.

Be tactful. Sometimes, there is no escape from dealing with family members. Maybe there is a shared chore to accomplish, or a coveted possession to be shared. Perhaps the holidays are coming and there is just nowhere to hide from one another. Sometimes, a little diplomacy can go a long way to defuse annoying issues before they come up. If you know where possible conflict could develop, you can approach the family member and propose a solution that will make both your lives easier from the start. Discussing, bargaining, even subtle bribing could settle issues before there’s even a problem. Also, the relationship with that particular family member may possibly be greatly improved with the exercise of such successful cooperation. You might even find that you are both smiling congenially as you collaborate for a common goal. This kind of resolution puts you both back on the same team. Cooperation is the exact reason we evolved to exist in small family groups, so it naturally leads to inner contentment, fulfilling a primal directive.

If you can’t beat ‘em, ignore ‘em. Sometimes, you finally just reach your wit’s end, and after blowing up at a person, bending over backward, or beating your head (or someone else’s) against a wall, you decide that you simply cannot endure the behavior or personality, peeve, or whatever of a family member any more. You accept that even though you may have pleaded with them, or discussed, screamed or muttered under your breath, bargained, debated or even threatened over a conflict, there is simply nothing that can be done to resolve the problem effectively. In a case like this, the best thing you can do is just concentrate on your own life and pay as little attention as possible to the annoyance factor. By effectively tuning out the cause of such colossal irritation, you can go about your own day with minimal disruption. Simply ignoring the family member can also save a great deal of energy and aggravation. If you are able to resist such provocation completely you’ll remain free of that sense of futility and frustration and maintain a sense of peace.

The information found on this document is compiled from extensive study of the sciences of physical and cultural anthropology along with the author's personal understanding and experience in various families of diverse individuals and the dynamics of conflict therein with the goal of finding solutions to maintaining a functional and peaceful coexistence within a single family unit.

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