Communicate. Make sure you're open about the concerns you have regarding your age difference. Unique challenges may present themselves because of the age factor, and they're not going to disappear just because you don't want to talk about them. For example, if one person is interested in having children while the other is not, it's important that this issue be discussed before the relationship becomes too serious.
Stay strong. While the number of older woman-younger man pairings appears to be
increasing to some degree, not everyone has embraced the idea. Moreover, the bulk of the scorn still seems directed at the reputation of the older woman. Therefore, it's important that you figure out how to deal with this criticism so that you don't mar your relationship. In the end, whether or not this relationship is right for you is solely up to you to decide.
Manage conflict. Fighting is bad for the heart--literally.Couple who were hostile or controlling also had an increased risk of developing cardiovascular problems. In any relationship, it's important to acknowledge and express your anger, instead of avoiding conflict or bottling up your emotions. Discuss your problems calmly, without pointing fingers at the other person. Remember to use "I" statements, such as "I feel hurt when..." instead of making accusations.
Write it down. Take 15 minutes a few days a week to jot down your feelings about the relationship. A participants who wrote about their relationships in a diary were more likely to still be together after three months than those who wrote only about mundane activities. The studies authors suggested that the act of writing might help make it easier to identify potential problems before they boil over.
Do nice things for your partner. Whether it's a small act, like making dinner, or making a large sacrifice, like moving for the other person's job, making these types of gestures can greatly improve a relationship.People who did nice things for their partner because they wanted to--not out of a sense of obligation--were even happier in their relationships.
Don't compare your partner to others. Instead of pointing out your partner's weaknesses and fueling their insecurities, try to extend at least one compliment. If you listen without criticizing, the other
Enhancing Relationship.
Wednesday, May 14, 2008
Posted by Jane at 3:21 PM
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